Posted by: sharethewhine | November 23, 2009

Dating Sucks

Is it too early to give up on dating?

Don’t get me wrong, I have been having perfectly nice dates with perfectly nice men. What should I be expecting?? I know better than to expect fireworks and lightning bolts, birds flying around and angels singing, but when does “nice” change to “wow”? First date? Second? Tenth? Does a handshake and “Nice to meet you” really mean that he is “not that into me” and I will never hear from him again? Does ANYone know the answers to these questions?

I repeat, dating sucks. A job interview with coffee. I suppose it would help if I actually enjoyed meeting new people….

So here is the rundown to date. Bachelor #1 was a coffee date. Online, this man did not appear to be my physical “type”, but I am interested in meeting friends, so I am not just limiting my search to “the one” (whatever that means). Date attempt #1 was a misfire, however. I sat at the coffee shop alone for 45 minutes. I figured I had been stood up (although my gut said this wasn’t the case), he had gotten the date/time wrong, or we had a miscommunication when deciding on which location of the chain to meet. It turns out, none of these scenarios were true. It took many emails to determine what had happened. Here is my version of the story: I walked in to the coffee shop. I scanned over the patrons, which comprised mostly of older couples. There were two men on their own. One was nervously looking around the shop, but did not fit the physical description. I wasn’t entirely confident on what this man looked like, as the best picture on the dating site had him in sunglasses and a goatee. The other man was closer, but did not have a goatee and was engrossed in a book. I walked slowly by the second gentleman and paused. I almost tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention, but chickened out (yes, I will admit it). The fact that he was clean shaven and completely absorbed in his book convinced me that this couldn’t possibly be the man I was looking for, so I stood in line for 10 minutes for my coffee and sat at a table for 45 minutes total. It turns out, the clean-shaven book reader WAS my date!! So, my rant is, if you are going to change your appearance SAY so and if you are meeting someone LOOK UP every once in a while. I was next to him, waiting in line for a total of 15 minutes. He didn’t look up ONCE. Gah!

Bachelor #2. We threw caution to the wind and met for a dinner date at a nice Italian restaurant. Unfortunately, it was less Disney’s “Lady and the Tramp” romantic and more awkward job interview with pasta. Are all first dates supposed to be awkward, or is this a bad sign?? At the start of the meal, I placed the wine list in neutral territory and started to point it out to him, when he waved it away and said “Well that probably isn’t a good idea if we are driving after, is it?” and chuckled.

WHAT??!?!

Oh….yes, that’s true….(Shit!!).

Now I couldn’t order a glass of wine without looking irresponsible! So much for loosening up with a drink! I believe we both did our best to power through, but he confessed to being tired (a couple of days later, in an email) and I was not only tired, but so nervous I was practically stroking out. I may have to reserve an official opinion until after we try again (if there is a second date!).

Bachelor #3. Another coffee date. I confirmed the address with him, which probably made him think I am type A, but I wasn’t risking another misfire. Based on his pictures, I was expecting someone slender but muscular, slightly geeky with glasses. In walks a tall, decidedly non-geeky, attractive man. No glasses and an eyebrow ring. Once again, I did not recognize him because of misleading photos (please see rant at the beginning of this post). Fortunately, he waved at me (I look like my picture, dammit!!!) and came right over. Despite him showing up better-looking and more “cool/artsy” than I expected, I was able to have a fairly enjoyable, normal (for me) conversation with him. The experts always say to be yourself and I think I achieved that goal. I don’t know if he will contact me again, based on gut impression and the aforementioned handshake/”Nice to meet you” combo. The only thing artsy or bohemian about me is the purple in my hair, so I question our compatibility. I am more “science club” nerd than misunderstood artist. We shall see if anything transpires.

Finally bachelor #4. This one is a new addition. He seems less interested in exchanging emails and is strongly campaigning to meet for coffee PDQ (ie- right away). I mentioned to him on Friday that I am planning to visit a girlfriend up the valley, but I need to talk with her first to determine which day will work. I haven’t followed up with him yet (I don’t have any more information yet) but I received another email from him last night, again asking to set a day. This is either flattering or disturbing. I will reserve judgement until after I meet him, but I am leaning to the latter.

So those are my current adventures. The only thing of which I am certain is that if I have to go on too many more first dates, staying permanently single is going to start looking very good. Hello, crazy cat lady!

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 22, 2009

Fad Diet Day ??

I am starting to have some sympathy for people trying to quit smoking. If it is this hard for me to “quit” sugar, I can only imagne the hell they must go through to butt out. Sadly, the only patch that aids sugar addiction is duct tape over the mouth.

After a few days of dietary debauchery, I am back home and ready to climb back on the wagon. Yesterday, I was doing well until last night. I was in Kelowna for a coffee date (more on that in my next post) and decided at 5 pm to take myself out to Milestones restaurant, so that my answer to the question “What did you do Saturday night?” wouldn’t be “I went to Wal-Mart”. Naturally, I had a glass of wine with dinner (Inniskillin Cabernet-Sauvignon….mmm…) and then after my meal I had a “Give me dessert or give me death” moment. The official excuse was that I was allowing extra time for the alcohol to leave my bloodstream, but really, who is kidding who??

Weight this morning (checked twice, the second time sans clothes): 153 lbs….AGAIN!! I am starting to believe that these acai berry supplements are either placebo powder in a pill, or the effects of the berries are exaggerated. Their claim to work even without changing your diet appears to be false. Either that, or my sugar binge was worse than I thought. I am going to continue until the end of the one month trial, because I want to give it a fair chance. It does not appear, however, that I will be matching the claims of  “lose 25 pounds in a month”. Disappointed? Yes. Surprised? Not even a little.

I am sitting here sipping acai berry tea (sugarless…sigh). I feel I must comment on the taste, because I find it funny (in both senses of the word). The initial flavour is fruity (obviously), but the undertone was initially hard to place. Health food store!! That smell that all health food stores have when you walk in…THAT is the flavour! How bizarre!

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 18, 2009

Fad Diet Day 7 and 8

Yesterday doesn’t count.

To be fair, I didn’t fall off of the wagon…I jumped. Exam stress followed by end-of-semester celebration turned into an all-out sugar binge. Damn you, teeny Halloween candy bars!! I knew it was going to be bad when I started in on the Tootsie rolls–I don’t even like Tootsie rolls!! The doughnut was fantastic, though, and the wine…

I still took the supplements (with the wine…I doubt THAT is acceptable behaviour), so I haven’t broken the diet test. In penance, I took my niece’s dog for two walks today. The walks were going to be much longer, but I have a low tolerance for bone-chilling wind and rain sprinkles. Steve (the dog) is also afraid of wind-blown leaves, so the decision to return home was unanimous! My brother-in-law has a great, high-tech scale that shoots some sort of current through your body to “accurately” determine both your weight and your body fat. Yesterday I was 149.5lbs (the fact that it measures to a decimal place makes me shake my head. How desperate to lose weight do you have to be to need your weight to the fraction of a pound??) and this morning I am 150lbs. Today I’ve been good so far, but it is harder than usual!!

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 17, 2009

Fad Diet Days 5 and 6

What started out as an experiment to see if acai berry supplements aid in weight loss combined with an online account to keep me honest in my goals is rapidly turning into a daily confessional.

Day 5 was not too bad for dietary intake. I had a coffee date and a supper date scheduled for that day and having been away from the dating scene for a long time, nerves prevented me from eating much. Details of the dates themselves will have to wait for another post, but the worst dietary sin of the day was a large Tim Horton’s “single-single”, and half of a milk-and-single sugar coffee from Blendz. Mmmmm….coffee with sugar……

Day 6 has been a disaster. I travelled to Vancouver, so I started with another large “single-single” (mmmmmm….). In Chilliwack I was starving and I did make a token effort to find something with some nutritional value, but ended up having a cheeseburger and large fries at a fast food establishment. There may or may not have been Golden Arches in front of the restaurant. I am officially blaming exam stress (my MR physics final is tomorrow and I am NOT ready) and PMS for this dietary transgression. Also, the 3 Halloween chocolate bars (whoops, make that 4). PMS and diets do not mix well.

I would claim that I will do MUCH better tomorrow, but I am pretty sure there is a bottle of wine with my name on it after my physics final is done tomorrow evening. Monsieur, a bottle of your finest Merlot…and a STRAW!!

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 15, 2009

Fad Diet Day 4

Drum roll, please….

Weight: 152 lbs. Woo!! The experts say that losing 1-2 pounds per week is the healthy way to lose weight, so it is nice to know I am being “healthy”. Still, a little voice inside me is saying “I gave up sugar for THIS??”

I dreamt about donuts and chocolate-drizzled strawberry tarts last night. Is that a bad sign?

One interesting side effect to drinking sugarless coffee: I am drinking less coffee now, too. Now that my morning cup of coffee is more medicinal than enjoyable, I tend to drink only half and toss the rest as soon as it gets cold, instead of reheating. I made less coffee this morning to compensate, but dumped a bunch of milk in it, so the volume of liquid is about the same. Bleah!!

Today I did a bit of a backslide into the world of sugar again. My afternoon snack of an apple MAY have been dipped in a bit of caramel, BUT I didn’t finish the little tub of caramel like I usually would, so that is something.

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 14, 2009

Fad Diet Day 3

OK, I may have cheated a little….

Who had money on day 3? Please collect your profits now!

It actually wasn’t THAT bad a cheat. This morning was the first day that I tried to drink my coffee with NO sugar in it. Now, those of you who remember my “large-triple-triple” days will confirm that this is a huge step for me!! Today, the step merely backfired. Several disgusting sips into the morning beverage (day 1 with milk instead of cream, too), my taste buds rebelled and I ended up pairing my coffee with a small chocolate Halloween leftover. My Dad, who has himself given up sugar for health reasons, assures me that I will get used to the taste of sugarless coffee. Granted, but the acclimatization process is proving painful!!

I will try again tomorrow, I promise.

I also vow to do better with that whole “exercise” thing. I have a Wii, so I may break it out and risk ridicule by bopping around the living room to the “Activate” game. I purchased the game and motion detector strap thingy a couple of months ago and have been too chicken to try it. Tomorrow! I will post my experience for proof.

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 13, 2009

Adios Anatomy, Phase 1!

Words cannot express how happy I am that my two anatomy  courses are done and I do not have to study for those exams any more!! Granted, I face two more courses in January, but I am savouring the respite! I have taken many an anatomy course in the past, but these sectional anatomy courses are very much 3-D oriented and therefore very different. I was excessively confident when I started in September, but soon I was to be humbled. By the time I had written the six exams in four weeks, I was mentally exhausted and finding motivation to excel lacking.

An example:

In a transverse sectional image showing the esophageal hiatus the:

a.   aorta will be seen immediately anterior to it

b.   inferior vena cava will lie posterior to the diaphragm

c.   aorta will also be seen anterior to the diaphragm

d.   gastroesophageal junction may be seen to the right of the midline

e.   aorta will normally be seen posterior and medial to the esophagus

 

Here is my version of the same question:

In a transverse sectional image showing the esophageal hiatus the:

a.   I don’t know

b.   I don’t care

c.   May I interest you in the FUNCTION of the esophagus, instead?

d.   I need a drink

e.   All of the above

(The answer to both questions, by the way, is e.)

I do have some parting words that I would like to share, especially in regards to my final anatomy final. First of all, I would like to thank the letters ‘a’ and ‘e’, without whom 90% of my last exam would have been blank. I would also like to thank Mr. Akon for singing a selection of his “Greatest Hits” in my head during my exam, with special focus on his newest hit “Sexy Chick” (with David Guetta). Finally, I would like to thank two Vancouver area radio stations for playing “Sexy Chick” not just once, but TWICE on my drive home from said exam.

Back to physics!

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 12, 2009

Fad Diet Day 2

Holy Hannah!

OK, I think I have figured out how these acai/cleanse supplements work. They seem to be based on two presumptions. First, your body is a temple. Any food you eat is considered a vile defiler of this temple and is immediately escorted out the back door. Second, you cannot eat if you are in the bathroom.

This second day hasn’t been as “cleansing” as yesterday, thank heavens!! I didn’t weigh myself today. Not only is it way too early for any noticeable results, any loss I do see will be the result of what can politely be described as “water weight”. The other unofficial side effect (meaning I don’t know if it is the acai berry pills or not), is slight nausea, which leads, for me, into appetite reduction. I get nauseous when I take pills anyway (like the multivitamin I am also taking), so I can’t necessarily blame the berry. Also, I don’t want to eat when I’m nauseated, so at least the urge to snack has waned. So, one good thing so far!

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 11, 2009

Diets, Tests and Other Forms of Torture

I am back from Vancouver and I am actually staying home for a whole week this time! Oooo! I have finished both of my Anatomy courses and my “unofficial” final marks look to be good enough for a solid pass. There is no actual “pass mark” designation in either course, which puzzles me and causes a wee concern. The bell curve hasn’t failed me yet (pun intended), so I should be safe. The only course left is the actual MRI course. MR physics! Shockingly, I am actually enjoying this course. The concepts are completely different to nuclear medicine radiation physics and are a bit challenging to grasp, but I actually find it interesting. Some things I am just having to accept on faith and see where they lead me. I do feel a little like Alice following the White Rabbit down the rabbit hole to Wonderland. My final final exam (for this term) is next week, so I am madly working to get my last assignment handed in. Bah, it is only MRI “safety”, so that can’t be important, right?

My side project is starting today: weight loss! I am carrying a little extra these days, so the goal is to lose a few pounds. In the interest of “science” and personal curiousity, I am going to try something controversial and see if it works. No, I am not endangering my health with Fen-Phen-esque diet pills. I am going to try taking acai berry supplements and a “cleansing” product. Oh, I hear a chorus of dissension already!! OK, so this acai berry is supposed to increase your energy, promote weight loss, cure cancer, do your taxes… Anyway, a skeptical news reporter volunteered to try this product, in order to publicly debunk it, but to her surprise it worked! Again, to satisfy my curiousity, I thought I’d do a similar experiment and keep you all apprised of the results. Maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t. The samples were free, so all I am out is a month.

OK, the product claims that you do not have to change your diet or routine, but I am going to implement a few minor changes, anyway. Starting 3 days ago, any time I want something bad for me as a snack, I must drink herbal tea. My Dad can confirm I now have about 90 types of herbal tea in the pantry and I am boiling that damn kettle about 2-4 times a day. I am reducing my wine intake (sob!). Starting Friday, I will switch from cream to milk in my coffee (I have to finish the cream first). For about two weeks, I have begun slowly reducing the amount of sugar in my coffee, with the goal being zero. I am already down to about a half a sugar spoon in a large cup of coffee (taste level: “bleah”). I am trying to eat less and have healthier snacks like almonds. I am trying to increase vegetables and cut down on grease, when possible (Dad makes the best french fries EVER!!). Finally, I will try to do some light exercise every other day (realistic starting goals, people!!), even if it is just hauling my ass up that damn hill outside Dad’s house (in my new shaping running shoes!)

I am going in to this experiment with high hopes, but low expectations. I don’t expect to be perfect and I already face a big obstacle: my trip to Florida in 2 weeks!! I may put the experiment on hold while on holiday, or I may continue with the supplements, I will see closer to the time. Either way, the whole “eating less/eating right” part of this exercise is going straight out the window for the whole holiday, that is guaranteed! Operation Weight Loss starts now. Starting weight (yes, unfortunately, I am even going to be honest here): 153 lbs.

Why am I telling you all this and promising to document the details (those that can be printed, anyway…this IS a cleanse!!)? To keep me honest! Feel free to give me feedback (or grief). With a little help from my friends and family, I hope there will be a little less of me to love soon….and hopefully my damn PANTS will FIT again soon!!!!!

In to the abyss!!

Posted by: sharethewhine | November 2, 2009

Small Towns

You know you live in a small town when:

 

1. The librarian has known you since you were two years old and still remembers your birthday.

2. The car horn is used for greeting friends, not road rage.

3. What’s road rage?

4. You see a truck stopped in the middle of the road in the middle of town (the term”downtown” certainly does not apply) to chitchat with his buddy, who is leaning up against the truck (he would have been standing on the yellow line if there had been one). The sad part was, they weren’t holding up traffic!!!

5. Jaywalking isn’t a traffic offense, it is a way of life. Only tourists use crosswalks.

6. Traffic signs and common traffic laws are merely suggestions. Random stops and left hand turns should be expected at any time. What is a signal indicator?

7. Your 5-minute errand takes you 15 minutes because the person in front of you is visiting with the salesperson.

8. Your now 15-minute errand has taken a half hour because the salesperson went to school with you/your brother/your sister and now you are visiting.

9. Any mention of your last name anywhere launches an investigation of your family history, starting at “So, are you related to…”

10. If you are a local and are short of money, you may say “I will catch you next time”. This is acceptable, because chances are, the shopkeeper knows your name and probably where you live.

11. Directions are not given with road numbers, they are “Take a left at the old Hansen place, which is now Dr. Scarfield’s office….Do you remember little Jimmy Scarfield? I knew his daddy. It’s hard to believe he is  a doctor now…”

12. “Downtown” is 3 blocks long.

13. Strangers smile at you in the street.

14. You know all the police officers’ names and you are not (necessarily) a criminal

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